How to Avoid a Photoshop Disaster
6 years ago
Wednesday, May 7, 2008
I was talking to Sigtia and Nishant* about my first post the other day, and they got me thinking about what if someone from my place read my post. I know that the chances of something like this happening are like one in a million, but I tell ya, roaming around and throwing stones in cow crap can be pretty boring sometimes. And pretty dirty too. But no one cares about that. Its not as if Chanel’s next is going to be "The Jat fragrance", is it?
I just don’t want a hundred Jats just waiting to beat me up at the Delhi airport as soon as I land. And I know for a fact that no one stops Jats. We Jats always have it our way, even in Delhi. You should see the way people look at us. The respect, the feel when you walk with all those eyes knowing what you are, nothing matches it. People can actually somehow sense that a Jat is coming. They just make way for us. Maybe its the smell...but that's only when its me.
Maybe I'll just gift my friends a copy of Spidey 3 in Haryanvi and they'll let me go. They were really pissed when it was released in Bhojpuri and not in Haryanvi. Bhojpuri is just some random words misspelt and put together. Haryanvi is much better, it gives you that feeling to which there're no words. Just imagine Spiderman saying,
"Yo rahyaa thaara dhabbi Spiderman!"
Ok, not cool.But still a lot better than Bhojpuri. You feel like crying when its time to smile and you are already sleeping when the emotional crap comes. At least in Haryanvi either you laugh off your chair or if you are a Jat you've just come for a gang fight in the hall. Its so much fun to fight in a hall as Mary Jane is saying, "Mannain tere gelyan naa rehna Peter". But the thing is, I seriously have no idea where in the world I'm gonna get the movie in Haryanvi.
Crap! I knew I should’ve hacked Sony Pictures and Marvel Comics rather than wasting my time with the CIA. After becoming Jats they aren’t gonna do any work anyways. Lazy CIA sonofabitches!
After they are done with me (I've yet to figure out how to make it alive), I swear I’ll go back to doing what Jats do best. Swearing, kicking ass, and of course, making fun of, eh, mainly Punjabis (They are like the blondes of Haryana. All the funny jokes, about them. Not you Nishant).
*Nishant wasn't actually a part of the conversation but he wanted his name in or the next time he won’t let me in his room without making me sing "Mere Haathon Mein Naun Naun Chudiyan Hain" to the whole hostel.
Labels: Jats
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3 Kryptonites:
gud...atleast u figured out abt the smell.......mayb dat'll make u realise dat u SERIOUSLY need a bath.....:P
:D
Either you're being really really satirical here, or jats actually are like that. :)
No offence meant, awesome post.
Finally, i can read bitsian blogs *yay*
Dude, I'm a Jat. Have you seen me like that? None of the parts about the buffaloes is true. But yeah, we Jats tend to do the rest of it sometimes.
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