Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Twelve Crazy Men

You know how people do crazy things sometimes? Yeah, that happens a lot in some places. My friends think all things crazy are done by the people from Haryana. Well, most of them actually are. But I've figured out that more than just one crazy race of people. (NOT THE JATS. We are above all that stuff. We are a whole different, but cool level of craziness.)

So anyways, its now almost one year since I got into this college, and these are a few things I have learnt and observed for which only an extraordinary mind like mine can care to write about. There are more, but my extraordinary mind can't remember them now.

Now this may even be my last one, cause a lot of people are going to want to kill me after this...

1. You don't get caught cheating in a test and then try to convince the invigilator to not to cut your marks by saying again and again, " Sir, please sir, career at stake!" SERIOUSLY??

2. When you are being ignored by the girl, you don't ask her, " Why don't you Hi me anymore?".....It was almost too funny to write without spelling mistakes.( And the same goes for any spelling mistake I ever make. I don't care if its in an obituary)

3. When you've got more hair than the Yeti and the Big Foot combined, you don't send forwarded messages to a girl you are interested in, then message her two minutes later asking why she doesn't want to talk to the Loch Ness Monster anymore. And you don't go to meet her with another friend who's a bigger despo than the chair he's sitting on in a place which is less romantic than the wallpaper in my phone( Nokia N73 3.2 megapixel, Lamb Of God wallpaper....You probably already know why I told you about the 3.2).

4. You don't just choose five random girls and start chatting with them on net without anything from either of the girls indicating that they were looking for hairy, pink shirt wearing guys to hook up with. The girls downloading something from your data is "not" a signal to do that unless "someone" has written a program that says so. If someone has, then I gotta hack that shit!

5. The rare, amazing ability to puke without getting drunk is not that good......Oh, this is too good to hide..it was Sigtia.

6. When you can bitch all day about people who deserve it, and if you have a lot of those around, maybe its a good idea to make a record label out of it.

7. You don't post gay things on Orkut. And you don't use the word 'dude' too many times. Believe me, "its not good".........And here comes the line.

8. This one's good. This guy is unaware of the existence of the option called 'Open in New Window.' If he had his Orkut Scrapbook open in one window and he wanted Orkut Home in another, he had to open a new window and login in orkut all over again. AND HE IS NOT A "JAT", if that's what comes to your mind right now.

9. If you have some unhealthy outgrowth on your little finger that looks like a large magnified version of your dildo, it is not something you brag about. And showing 'that' to people instead of your middle finger, its "NOT" cool. Really.

10. You don't just start growling when you have nothing to say...that's not even lame.

11. If you haven't had a bath for 4 days there's still no reason to tell that to 15 people at a time. And if there's a girl in the group who hasn't had a bath for 4 days too, believe me, the smell is still coming from only you.

12. Even if the girls in Gossip Girl are hot, its still no excuse to watch it guys.

13. This one was gonna be about Nishant, but I've made enough enemies for one day.

5 Kryptonites:

lakshmy said...

damn good stuff.really. :).keep writing.

anuj said...

"12. Even if the girls in Gossip Girl are hot, its still no excuse to watch it guys."
LOL...but still the show is pretty interesting!

Rover said...

wwoamen @ point 12

wwoeku: the captcha i had to enter for posting this. cant u disable it???

Lordhelldriver said...

Dude, seriously awesome stuff man. When'd you get funny? Let me guess- the record thing was me, wasn't it?

The Witch King of Rohtak said...

of course it was